After much thought and some discussion about my stage fright experience I am brought to think about the work of Wilhelm Reich.  He wrote about character defenses (and much more).  Defenses that were created in our early life that stay a core part of us until we recognize or learn about them and make a decision to change them.  This process can be a conscious process or can happen because what we are doing is not working in life and we change to a behavior that does work.

The first defense is escape and it is the result of trauma while in the womb, at birth, and or during our first year of life.  It is a fear of annihilation because birth can be a life or death situation.  Somehow the stage fright triggered an intense fear which seems likely to be explained by something far deeper and far more significant than what was happening in the moment.

What to do?  Keep working to rewire the brain,  (I am safe, I belong here.  Life is change, I can handle anything) so that under similar circumstances in the future the unconscious fear is no longer present.  There is not a trigger nor a button to be pushed and the fear of annihilation does not take over.

Just something to think about.

Sincerely,

Amy